𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐌𝐈𝐋𝐋𝐀 ♱

[RPACC] CARMILLA THAYER. 27 Y/O. LESBIAN. SHE/HER. FAITHFUL HAWKS' VOCALIST. MAVIS' BEST FRIEND.

An unwretched evidence of which paths money can lead you to when no amount of it can buy what you yearn for. Tormented by her mother's lack of fondness towards her, Carmilla carries an haunting feeling which converts itself in a call for bars, drinks and going to bed with older women, looking for their affection as though it would fullfil her sine qua non for love. In the absence of care, the noxious nurture she received bleeds through the cracks and becomes a reflection of what once she condmned, setting a miserable destiny for herself that no loving father would be capable to prevent.
Either way, no prerogative or knowledgement could teach a pitiful soul to esteem for whoever it isn't oneself so when her homophobic mother expelled her out of home, Carmilla felt nothing but a relief and freeing feeling of shattering bounds of what it seemingly suppressed her inherent desires. Throughout her experience of going from one apartment to another, while not lasting with no woman at all, she got aware of how unsettling it felt to share her life with anyone else than herself when she only longed for the adrenaline of having forbidden sex with all those women - and it no longer gave her the desired pleasure. What once was an escape of reality became her last desire.
She found purpose in music. Music moved her just as much as her love for women. The melodies inside her thoughts turned into lyrics written in napkins and yellowish papers until it grow as something beyond her — something melancholic and aroused slipping through each letter as dripping blood. Her artistry depiciting an extention of the figure she once felt obliged to hidden, aiming to seem lovable by others. Therefore, whoever got close to the inherently troublesome aspects that embraces this woman knew they would never get off of it easily or be the same as before. She turns up the reveries of everyone's mind with her God-like behavior and devilinshly intentions in a way not even herself could escape.